My Womanifesto (2012)

1.Don’t strive for someone else’s perception of happiness: if a promotion/a big car/marriage/John Lewis lifestyle doesn’t make you happy don’t bother trying to get it. Live for you

2. Don’t smile just because you feel pressured to. Especially in the street when a man walks past you; look straight ahead, confidently, expressing how you feel. Who the fuck walks around smiling any way?

3. Cook for yourself

4.Don’t hold back an opinion because you’re afraid to be seen as any of the following:
-“over opinionated”
-“too serious”
-“over analytical”
you’re never these things; it’s just (generally, some) men’s way of coping with women who have conviction, or any insight into the world

5. Burp when you feel like it

6. Never humour men who make a sexual/aesthetic comment to you or your friends on the street, but choose the best tactic at the time, be it sarcasm, or physical violence, depending on your judgement of safety.

7. Take a rape alarm out with you, when/if you want to; not because its a precondition of being a women; it’s a rapists responsibility not to rape, not yours to try and prevent it.


9. Express yourself verbally; don’t worry about being seen as any of the following:
– “over sensitive”
-“too serious”
-“over emotional”
-“prude” / “over sexual”/ “slutish”
these are just common gaslighting terms some men (and some women) use to pass the emotional work onto a woman, or emotionally manipulate you. This is when your emotional intelligence is transformed into a negative trait, because the other person can’t necessarily comprehend your complexity, or rate of processing information. Moreover, also don’t be afraid of being poetic with your expressions.

10. Keep a lot of close friends and never neglect them for a lover(s). Also, blur the boundary between lover and friend if it feels right or just happens; all relationships are ‘relationships’, but be clear about what you want.

11. Never underestimate the power of capitalism; everyone is somehow a victim of this shit oppressive environment, and you should point this out (when you feel like it)

12. Remember in hard times: it is not your duty to explain to every ignorant person why other people are oppressed and how other people are privileged. Sometimes it’s OK to just get angry; you alone are not a martyr and you have no expectations of you

13. Talk about menstruation in all its complications and beauty whenever you feel like it. Don’t hold back just because there’s a guy in the room, or your family are there. It’s never “too much information” when that very information pre-determines human existence. HOLA.

14. Try to smash all negative social stigma towards: feminism, drugs, homosexuality, transexuality, women’s bodily hair -> it’s just a part of the institutional structures that help keep us homogenized cogs in a system; un-free and ashamed.

15. Tell people they look good when you think it; everyone is insecure in this CCTV photoshop society

16. Talk about sex and masturbation if you feel like it

17. Dance naked, alone, at least once a month

18. Don’t let any one undermine or belittle your clitoris (it’s the centre of pleasure – it’s incredible – don’t forget the Myth of the Vaginal Orgasm – make sure you communicate with your partner(s) )

19. Don’t demonize or make fun of other women, and recognise when it happens. Remember how class and race and sexuality and upbringing are intertwined.

20. Keep questioning everything

- C.J. 2012

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